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Saturday, December 24, 2005

im just ranting. so dont mind me. good for me. the sun finally decided to show its face. please dont rain. not a single drop at all. please.

these are just times when you have loads to blog. wanting to blog like all the time. and learn to type even faster than usual cause you're using the computer like a criminal. sigh. i really dont like staying home at all please. with all thats happening at home. cant stand it anymore. a day never gone this bad. seriously. forget about the details. cause i dont wanna go into that again please. i hated it all. think i'd die if i end up staying in or something. sigh sigh sigh ! say im useless or what shit. but i dont wanna stay home. not today nor tomorrow.

i was looking forward to today and tomorrow. but now im just looking forward to stepping outside ! i feel so shit. i dont know if i should even be looking forward to going out in the first place. i really dont know. can i even enjoy my day. people are asking if ive got any plans for the night. my answers are all the same. only if i can go out. ohwells.

thanks to my smart dad for his non stop screaming. scolding. screwing the hell outta mich and i. talking no sense. not forgetting us quarrelling big time. unforgettable please. i hated it. hated all of it. i fucking cried. i hate to. i didnt want to. but the way he placed things. all that he said. guess i saw it coming. but i didnt think that it would be at this time. like why now. i dont know. i dont feel sorry at all. its like a routine. we didnt want this to start. but he had to. fer no reason at all. thankyou for spoiling my day. im fucking eighteen. am i treated as one. i doubt so. not at all.

whichever it is. im really tired. hardly slept last night. if i could. i would have ran away. im off now. before someone comes home. goodbye. wish my luck please. merry christmas eve.

m e l i s s a ;
10:27 AM